A Letter to My Little Bear

To My Little Bear,

Today's your birthday, and I couldn't be prouder of the person you're becoming. Though you can be a pain in my neck (I'll stay PG family-friendly for this post) at times, I still love you to the moon and back all the same.

We had a rough start, you and I. You popped into the world at a very inconvenient time for eleven-year-old me; you came into the world when I no longer begged my mother for a sibling because I was ok being the spoiled only child. I had spent over a decade entertaining myself and hogging mom's attention, and then this little crying raisin had to go and ruin it all. Your introduction into my life was so sudden that I didn't know what to do. For real, when you were born, I was in the delivery room, hiding behind an armchair in the corner. I was eleven, and I didn't have the tools yet to understand what I was being given. 

And for the first few years of your life, I made that known. I transitioned from butt-hurt eleven-year-old to angsty teenager upset that the world had turned my life upside down. As an angsty teenager, the only thing I knew how to do was take my anger out on you, the innocent party (because you certainly didn't conceive yourself). Family members berated me with lines like, "You're her older sister!" or "You're sixteen Chloé be more mature than that!", and they kinda have a point with that second one, but age doesn't factor into this equation. Because no matter how old the two of us get, you'll always be my annoying little sister and I'll always be your overbearing and overprotective older sister. 

As a child that grew up primarily surrounded by adults, I never really had anyone in my corner. I had no partner in crime, my age at least. And it wasn't until I moved across the country that I realized what I had. That now, no matter what, I had gained someone who would always be in my corner, and I in hers...once, she grew up enough to figure out that I'm not trying to hog mom's attention (at least, not all the time). 

Because I didn't have siblings as a child, I got my idea of what siblings were like from the crazy stories my mom told me of hers and what I saw on TV. I was always envious of what I saw on my screen; a relationship with bonds that could never be broken. Older brothers protecting their younger sisters, long lost twin sisters pranking their parents into falling for each other and being mischevious in the process, younger siblings annoying their older siblings to no end, two families of ten and eight joining together and the eighteen children conspire to separate the two parents only to realize that they all want to be a family in the end...you know, the usual stuff.

But when I got you, you weren't like the movies. You actually came into my room to annoy me and broke my stuff and played your small steel drum loudly in the backseat because you knew it annoyed me (true story). You were all the things the movies warned me about, but you were real. 

Looking back on your eight years on this earth, I wouldn't change a thing except for how I reacted. Sure, it's natural to feel annoyed and act annoyed as your older sister, but I wish I would've spent more time joining in on your shenanigans. Having a teenager and a toddler at the same time isn't the best combination, but we made it work. I only wish I could've done more than just "made it work." 

Baley, you truly are the greatest thing to ever happen in my life. If not for you, I would still be a spoiled kid with only child syndrome. Now I'm a bigger spoiled kid with a little sister. Now, I've got a forever adventure buddy. I've got something better than the movies, though I think we probably deserve our own, I've got you. 

My little mini-me, that's going to be much taller than me soon. The little person, who at two-years-old, told our mother when she was asked to do something that she "had homework to do," and promptly walked away with coloring books in hand (an excuse I often used, the homework not the coloring books). The little person that has a taste for adventure, and travel, that rivals my own. 

To my little bear, who's not so little anymore, thank you for being my little bear, my annoying little sister, my partner in crime, and my travel buddy. I hope your day is as bright as your goofy smile and contagious laugh. I hope your day is filled with laughter, love, and lots of cake (thanks, Britt). I love you to the moon and back, kid, and don't you ever forget it.

Love, 

Sissy